The Best Rewards After Infertility - Building Friendships & Families

The Best Rewards After Infertility - Building Friendships & Families

Rewards are not always the one's that come to mind like, money, tokens, prizes or trophies.  Many of the best rewards are those of love, friendship and knowing that you can make a difference just by being there for someone. 

The past few weeks of anticipation of many friends that have or are about to give birth has made me think about how rewarding it is after my infertility journey to be part of theirs.  I am truly blessed to have my son after a long road of uncertainty with infertility.  Now with my book and being involved in many support groups and raising awareness for infertility it is a great feeling to be able to contribute to the community.

I check in, follow up - whether it's an email, a phone call, a text or if I get the opportunity to see a friend for a quick meet.  This is not only life long friends, this includes those that I have grown a relationship with online through Facebook, Twitter Chats, emails from my website, through my book or through a friend of a friend.  It's a great feeling to be there for all of them through the good, bad and the ugly.  You have to include it all because with infertility you never quite know what will hit you. It hurts you to hear the bad and the ugly but it only gives you the strength to continue to offer support for them to carry on.

The best thing that you can hear from anyone going through treatments is, "I'm pregnant".  You feel like its you all over again, the moment you found out and got that phone call!  You take the statement and run with it, literally shouting with pure joy for others, tears may fall and then the anxiety of the next nine months kicks in.  It's terrible that the thought of what could go wrong comes into play with such a happy moment, unfortunately it's a sad reality with infertility.  With disappointment after disappointment, when the happiness comes it all too surreal - you have to pinch yourself to know that this is really happening.  

You go through every possible moment with them even if its via email - morning sickness, exhaustion, cravings, weird feelings, emotions, and just moving along to the end. It's an exhilarating feeling just to be there and here from them during their big moments.  To get to the day of them giving birth is priceless, a moment you cannot even imagine. Waiting for that picture mail or Facebook post - you're on the edge of your seat.  Yes, for them they have made it to the end and have their miracle but for me it's something more than that - it's a feeling of how this ugly disease could have caused so much pain for so many and have such a beautiful ending.  This is not the ending just the beginning for so many beautiful family moments to come.   For those that have a hard time breaking the silence to family and friends, follow your gut and reach out to those that are online.  With personal subjects of infertility or pregnancy loss, there are groups out there for you.  Allow yourself to share you stories and  help each other through it together.  You're sure to meet new friends that will be there for continued support.  

I feel that through my book and sharing my story, I have gained so much from so many strong men and women.  It's not just the support that I give, it's the life long relationship knowing that they now have their miracle, hoping that they will continue to lend a hand and make this support system a domino effect.  The strength of these amazing women I am talking about have really touched my life as I hope to have touched theirs.